don's report archive

by Donald B. Ardell, Ph. D.

Wellness in the Headlines
(Don's Report to the World)

Today's DR or Don's Report consists of a pro and a con commentary on the proposal I offered here during the past few days on enhanced security at airport check-in. My proposal, in case you missed it, looked at airport security in a manner that most likely never occurred to Homeland Security officials or to the big thinkers at TSA. It did so from a wellness point of view. I cast aside political correctness and prevailing norms when I wrote that essay -- I think both inhibit the imagination and add to the risks of safe passage. I think my plan is a breakthrough concept that would boost security AND the health of the population, make flying less congested while transforming the crowded check line hassles into fascinating, even entertaining spectacles. You can read all about it, if you did miss it, right here.

If you did read it, perhaps you had a strong reaction to the plan, for or against. Here are two commentaries about the proposal. The first not so favorable; the second pretty enthusiastic. I hope you enjoy both.

Con: Bob Ludlow

Don: First I'll acknowledge that the essay is funny, at least in part; but humor can't be the entire point of an Ardell article, so there has to be an important wellness message or two buried somewhere in all the silliness and goofy imagery. One somewhat trivial message that comes across is that prudishness is undesirable. While I agree with that in general, I don't think objecting to participating in group nakedness necessarily makes one a prude, or even a fundamentalist nut-case.

The really serious wellness message that comes through to me is that if we were required to appear naked in groups of people, we would be more motivated to do something about the deplorable state of our corpulent, flabby, UGLY bodies. Most people in this country, judged by contemporary standards of attractiveness, do not have attractive bodies. Many, if not most, are all too painfully aware that their naked or semi-naked bodies are deemed ugly by the vast majority of observers. For many of them, being forced to display those bodies in public is probably more humiliating than almost anything they could do. Thus, they will be motivated to avoid the humiliation, possibly by adopting a wellness lifestyle.

I doubt that for several reasons. First of all, it's not all that unusual to see fat people at public beaches, although I am sure many stay away because they don't want to be mocked behind their backs or possibly catch sight of the disgust on other people's faces. Just about all fat people are already well aware that obesity is deemed ugly in our culture. They know they are not attractive, that many others find them repulsive. Many have tried time and again to lose weight, and some have lost large amounts of weight only to put it back on again, sometimes with a vengeance. So I reject the idea that public humiliation is going to make much of a dent in our growing obesity problem.

Another consideration is that we can no longer be so sure that "overweight" is unhealthy. Recent, well- funded scientific studies don't support the idea that overweight is unhealthier than normal weight. The studies do show that overweight--not obesity--is healthier than underweight. So should overweight people be made to feel humiliated about their pudginess? Why?

And should we really propose scenarios where truly obese people are further humiliated than they already are by an uncompassionate, judgmental, youth-and- beauty-obsessed culture? Maybe our ideas of attractiveness need serious adjustment. Not everyone has the potential for a lean, athletic body, and it would probably be a whole lot healthier for all concerned if we encouraged people to feel more comfortable about themselves. In some respects it's remarkable that obese people are as mentally and emotionally healthy as everyone else, considering the prejudice and unkindness they experience.

Finally, it is clear to me that obesity in the U.S. is a cultural phenomenon: far too many social and economic forces conspire to make it almost inevitable that a large percentage of the population will get fat. Many of the lifestyle habits that result in obesity are acquired in childhood. We need to take steps as a culture to combat those relentless, insidious forces. Making people feel bad about their bodies and holding them solely responsible for doing something about their ugly bodies smacks of blaming the victim. As with so many things in our dysfunctional society, the real villain is cultural norms driven by the marketplace. It is, of course, very Republican to blame the victim rather than the sacred free market.

Along with atheists, fat people are one of the few groups it is still okay to disparage in public. It is far too easy to make fun of fat people, explicitly or implicitly. Either way, it is wrong, hurtful, and counterproductive.

Judging from the pervasiveness of health and beauty magazines and the content of TV and movies, Americans are obsessed with thinness and beauty. Despite this, the vast majority spectacularly fail to attain those ideals. There are no easy answers, for sure. Despite your heroic efforts and compelling arguments for an active wellness lifestyle, it ain't gonna happen in this country, at least not anytime soon. One thing none of us should do is perpetuate negative stereotypes. We need to approach the problem with compassion, understanding and continuing research of the highest quality.

Oh yeah, if you want to keep male Muslim terrorists off airplanes, substitute strippers for flight attendants.

Pro: Sandy Scott

LOL!! Only from your incredibly creative, humorous, devious, iconoclastic mind could such an idea emanate that would solve a major problem(s) that affects all air travelers, but at the same time has potential health benefits! As an ex-police officer, I was ready to pooh pooh your plan, being well aware of the incredible things that can be hidden in one's anus, but you solved the problem by coupling mandatory (hopefully advanced) yoga positions with your proposed security area dress code. You call your idea ingenious. You are too modest, good fellow. Once this idea is promulgated on a widescale basis, you assuredly will become a Nobel Laureate -- perhaps even the Nobel Peace Prize will be yours. I propose that version of the award in that I envision enjoying much peace rather than stress when I travel by air. Rather than the heretofore painful going through security experience, I envision myself getting to the airport very early to take a couple of nude yoga classes, and then hanging about for a couple enjoyable hours.

As a retired pilot, I do know that the airlines will mount a vigorous campaign against your incredibly pragmatic, brilliant solution to a major problem. But I believe there is an added benefit to your plan. We can get retribution against the airlines (as they shrink in size like the Wicked Witch of the North) for packing us in their overcrowded tubes, making us sit in too little space and serving us aged peanuts thrown at us by scowling, overweight flight attendants who are simultaneously announcing our late arrival.

If you can solve this complex, long-standing problem so easily, I must wonder: Is there still time to throw your hat in the ring for the Democratic nomination for President? Imagine what you could do for the nation applying your problem-solving skills to major national and world issues.

In closing, I wonder how many other world problems can be simply solved with the same requirement of nudity? Hmmmm. Envision, for example, a restaurant in a benighted state that still permits smoking sections. A customer asks to be seated in this hazardous section. The Maitre d' says, Monsieur (this a French restaurant), since the mandate signed by President Ardell, you must remove your clothes prior to being seated. Of course, when thought through carefully, I do see some health related problems to my proposal. I, for example, would assuredly take up smoking, and I would undoubtedly spend an inordinate amount of time dining in restaurants.

I propose that we run a nationwide contest to find the best problem that can be solved with the nudity solution. But alas, perhaps the best solution has already been found by you, dear doctor. Seriously though, a really great essay! I often rue the fact that your articles don't get more widespread distribution. You should be the thinking man's Erma Bombeck. Why don't you have a regular column someplace?

P.S.  As to what Bob Ludlow wrote, here's what I say to that: Boo, hiss -- the con side is longer than the bloody essay. The con rant is a prime example of over-thinking a very effective, brilliant solution to a major problem. I suppose that is why we need at least two political parties. On one side, we have a very astute observer and thinker (that would be me) putting you up for the Nobel Peace Prize, and on the other a plea by Bob Ludlow about the plight of the fatties. I do not believe in censorship (except in this case). The con side commentary should have surely qualified for the circular file! :-)   Kill da bum!

(Note: This essay will be filed in the archives in the MEANING DOMAIN under the skill area of humor. Additional articles related to this theme may be found there.)

(Ed. Note: Views expressed in this and other columns are those of the author and not necessarily those of the SeekWellness Editorial Board.)

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