don's report archive

by Donald B. Ardell, Ph. D.

Wellness in the Headlines
(Don's Report to the World)

At an early age, perhaps ten, I had a fateful brush with intellectual stimulation. On my way to nowhere one afternoon, I found, discarded in the street, a battered but intact paperback book entitled 30 Days To A More Powerful Vocabulary. I read a page, then another and decided then and there I would read and master the entire work--in 30 days, as the author intended! Amazingly, it was a propitious time for me when, to paraphrase Woody Allen, I faced a critical crossroad. One road led to ruination and despair; the other to annihilation and hopelessness, so I realized I had to choose wisely! Thanks to this little book, I found another, third road or alternative path. Yes, 30 Days... made all the difference, for it truly delivered on the promise of a better vocabulary--and much more, as words lead to ideas and concepts and new possibilities.

The concept of this book was that anybody could, through diligence and practice, develop a more powerful vocabulary. By studying the definitions of a few key words daily, as well as their roots and, most important, actually using these "power words" in original sentences, I made each a treasured part of my verbal armamentarium. Even better, the reaction I got from using such "big words," as my friends called them, sparked interest in leaning more big words (most were not big, just unfamiliar), and each word opened up new areas of awareness and curiosity.

Of course, I was slightly (ok, very) obnoxious at first. I loved to unload what I thought at the time were astonishingly witty sentences at home ("My, dear brother, but don't you look cadaverous today!") It was easy to wow my friends ("Hey, Joe-baby, make a prodigious effort and exacerbate the situation here, would you?"), confound my enemies ("We appreciate your prevarications but no thanks") and impress my teachers ("But, the dog masticated my homework.") Not a lot of attention was given to the sensibility of the sentences, the extent to which they conveyed nuances of intention or if the chosen words led to desired behaviors on the part of the listener. It was just a power trip for a little kid playing around with high explosive language. The bottom line was that having a bit of knowledge could be useful, not to mention a bit dangerous.

So, you are probably wondering, "Why is he telling us this?" Well, the reason is that I have a word for you. Practice this word and you, too, can have a more powerful vocabulary. Maybe you, too, will be able to appear astonishingly witty, wow your friends, confound your enemies and impress your teachers. Well, at least maybe you might think so.

All that said, here is my wellness word for the day. Maybe someone else can come up with a word for tomorrow, and someone else the day after and so on for the next month. Then we will all have more powerful vocabularies.

My suggested word for this day is the noun "panpsychist." As the late, great Mr. Rogers used to say, "Can you pronounce panpsychist, boys and girls?" A panpsychist is one who believes that everything, whether animal, vegetable or mineral, has a soul. Quoting from my source (The Superior Person's Second Book of Weird and Wondrous Words by Peter Bowler, Godine Publisher, Boston, 1992, pp. 74-75): "Perhaps today's paradigmatic panpsychist is the young lady who gives her hatchback a Christian name and speaks affectionately of it by that name. On the other hand, there are also people who play music to flowers. Then there are the gamblers who harangue their dice and the homemakers who stand at their front doors, shouting `Grow, you bastard, grow!' at a newly seeded lawn. Perhaps the ultimate in panpsychism is a case known to the author--a person whose idealism was so unstinting that he once attempted to have a conversation with a certified public accountant."

In any event, keep your eyes open as you wander down the road. You never know what you might come across. In fact, keep your eyes open when you cross the road, as well. Also, look on the bright side of life.

(Note: This essay will be filed in the archives in the MENTAL DOMAIN under the skill area of factual knowledge. Additional articles related to this theme may be found there.)

(Ed. Note: Views expressed in this and other columns are those of the author and not necessarily those of the SeekWellness Editorial Board.)

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