don's report archive

by Donald B. Ardell, Ph. D.

Wellness in the Headlines
(Don's Report to the World)

When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.

Mark Twain, Puddn'head Wilson

The only thing you really need to know about stress is everything about it depends on you! By that I mean the extent to which stress is an issue for you, your ability to deal constructively with stressors and the cumulative impact of stress on your life, for better or worse, depend primarily on the way you respond to events and circumstances. Your responses constitute the key variables affecting whether you feel stressed out, or not, by anything and everything that impacts your life. Surprisingly, a lot of people I encounter in workshops and elsewhere seem unaware of this fact. Of course, a lot of people do not grasp other realities that, quite frankly, seem rather obvious. For your review, here are a few "obvious realities" about stress or at least "alleged realities," seen from a wellness perspective, that some of us who promote wellness lifestyles think are obvious, but which may not be so self-evident to everybody. Then again, I could be mistaken about this -- all the observations that follow could be perfectly obvious. I hope they are, especially to you.

• Resilience is the second line of defense against stress. Once you understand that your reaction is key, the next safeguard is to have a psychological level of health or emotional intelligence that allows you to manage challenges, surprises, setbacks and all the rest in relative stride. This is the nature of resilience. Resilience is about how you handle things. Resilience is made up of a set of skills, competencies and favorable supports, such as connections with good friends and caring adults, a sense of plentiful opportunities and a mental set reflecting high expectations.
• A hallmark of good stress management skills is the capacity to recover quickly, physically and mentally, from perceived setbacks and to view all things in perspective, allowing a continued focus on the bright side of life. Awful things happen, even in the most fortunate lives, both personally and to others, including occurrences beyond family and friendship circles. A healthy person is not untouched or unmoved by larger human tragedies and other large-scale misfortunes.
• Little things make quite a difference, over time. Every now and then throughout the day, bring into conscious awareness a recognition of your breathing pattern and, if necessary, pause to take a few deep inhalations, exhaling slowly while thinking of a desirable, serene setting. Also, be aware of the amount of fun you have had in recent hours (not days or weeks!) and, if you decide you could use it, have a few laughs and thereby increase your blood flow. How? That depends -- on available possibilities, for one thing -- and your sense of humor, for another.
• Treating symptoms of stress is akin to treating a preventable illness. It's a good idea to pay attention to the symptoms of any illness and treat the condition, but it's much better to avoid illnesses in the first place. This is quite possible in many, if not most, instances via a wellness lifestyle. In any event, better to train to deal wisely with stressors as they occur, by changing how you react to them, instead of putting all your attention and resources into struggles to eliminate or treat the symptoms of stress.
• Use gimmicks for entertainment, and/or to demonstrate a point (in other words, that you CAN control your emotional response to situations or obtain a placebo effect), but don't rely on them for managing stress. A number of expensive but relatively useless stress toys are used by some adults in workplace settings, allegedly for "biofeedback." These are largely junk. They include video games and finger clip devices attached to a PC connected with software programs. Consider these elaborate methods for making money created by enterprising entrepreneurs, and little more. They claim measuring heart rhythms much the same way body temperature is taken demonstrates how the body handles varied stressful situations. Well, OK. So what? You can reduce anxiety simply by paying attention to obvious symptoms, such as heart rate increases, discomfort, fear and the like, none of which requires devices. More important, negative stress reactions can be avoided altogether by functioning in a wellness manner, as previously described in this essay. Why wait until AFTER symptoms (proven by spikes on a graph) are seen or problems encountered?

Well, some of these are more obvious stress remedies than others, and more could be listed but you get the idea. To manage stress, become and remain fit, keep things in perspective, embrace and celebrate your sense of responsibility for making the best of everything that happens, breathe deeply regularly, have a lot of fun, don't take yourself too seriously and develop a resilient personality. Don't waste your money on stress workshops, books or biofeedback machines and, last but not least, always look on the bright side of life.

(Note: This essay will be filed in the archives in the MENTAL DOMAIN under the skill area of stress management. Additional articles related to this theme may be found there.)

(Ed. Note: Views expressed in this and other columns are those of the author and not necessarily those of the SeekWellness Editorial Board.)

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