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by Donald B. Ardell, Ph. D.
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Wellness in the Headlines
(Don's Report to the World)

Dealing with Food: A Few Principles to Consider

Sunday February 18, 2001

Yesterday, I suggested the first principle for dealing with food or other cravings is to embrace responsibility. Here are a few additional self-management tips that may be helpful:

Don't expect perfectionism. Lighten up and, to reduce the pressure on yourself, indulge a bit on occasions. Have the donut, chocolate bar, or whatever it is you find so attractive, so it does not have quite the power of the forbidden fruit. It's usually not that big a deal, especially if you are living well for the most part. A few excursions toward the top of the food pyramid (the high fat, sugary stuff devoid of nutrients) won't do you great harm to your overall lifestyle quality if other positive initiatives are underway. Enjoy and don't make a big deal about the cravings. Don't even think of food desires as cravings.
Make as many wise choices as possible, day after day, not just nutritionally but in exercise and other wellness dimensions -- this will reduce the effect of the occasional departure from orthodoxy. Instead of thinking of negative wants as cravings, view such natural impulses as simple preferences, which take time to reshape or replace. Given your overall marvelously sound diet and splendid lifestyle, such less-than-optimal preferences will little affect the quality of your existence -- or your worth and value to your family, team, country, or whatever you want to be of worth to!
Keep things in perspective. My friend Susan Mitchell wrote a book about people killing for cookies entitled I'd Kill For A Cookie. Susan did not literally mean that some who crave cookies or something else (usually not vegetables or fruits) would commit murder to get them. Susan used the phrase kill for a cookie to dramatize that people do get so very serious about these cravings. The fact is that cravings associated with foods, like those related to sex, power, or money can lead some people not blessed with a sensible outlook to desperate measures. Susan's message is a good one -- for many not immersed in self-management, cravings are a serious nuisance. Fortunately, save for complete lunatics, murder is not normally associated with cookie or other food cravings! So, keep things in perspective!
If you manage to succeed, most of the time, in sustaining your commitment to excellence, occasional preferences of a unsound nature can be channeled into healthy outlets, not negative indulgences. If you still think you have cravings, focus first on learning about and shaping an artful lifestyle. Once that is in place and providing you with increased satisfaction and the desire for even more positive payoffs, the temptations to indulge recklessly will be mitigated. And, the occasional departures from virtue won't lead you to dysfunctional guilt and conflict.
Stay calm. If you want some food that seems inconsistent with your healthy diet, don't make a big deal about it. Assess the situation, calmly and without stress. Ask yourself if the short-term pleasure is worth the price tag, if circumstances are conducive to a bit of self-indulgence at this time, and if enjoying a cookie or whatever is that important. A choice can then be made, calmly, without feelings of hysterics, doubt, stress, regret, and all of that mayhem over cookies-type foolishness.

In summary, go easy on severe interpretations of things. What you once called cravings are just wants and desires, some better for you than others. Make your choices and get on with living well. Self-managers are content to engage in balanced lifestyles filled with humor, play, the pursuit of passions, and a quest for added meaning and purpose.

In this context, whether to eat an ice cream sundae or not deserves little deliberation; it's not consequential in the larger scheme of things. Isolated food choices are rarely consequential. Reserve a term like a "craving" for something really indulgent, not a bloody cookie, for goodness sakes. A cookie (and other gustatory treats) should not amount to a hill of beans.

Basically, you are well advised to protect yourself against all risks -- large and significant as well as silly and inconsequential -- by managing yourself with panache and grace.

All the best. Comments welcomed.

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